AMERICA’S NEWSPAPER OF RECORD:
Morbidly Obese Pete Hegseth Denies Any Knowledge Of What Happened To Leftover Lobster For The Troops https://t.co/YwsMeSXtQv pic.twitter.com/vo7CVdorel
— The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) March 12, 2026
March 13, 2026
HMM: NASA targets April 1 to launch astronauts around the moon. Good luck, guys.
BATTLESWARM: Iran Strikes Day 13. “U.S. forces pass the 5,500 targets mark, the regime starts emptying the bank accounts of citizens to stay afloat, China’s weapons are (still) garbage, more Iranian planes cratered on runways, a tanker burns off Iraq, Weekend at Mojtaba’s, and the idea that our troops in harm’s way might be eating well enrages the Democrat Media Complex.”
ITS ORIGIN AND PURPOSE, STILL A TOTAL MYSTERY: “The Motive May Never Be Known” Is Now “The Motive Is White Supremacy, Somehow.”
Seriously, you don’t hate the @nytimes enough.
A synagogue with a preschool is targeted.
The NYT reminds readers it was “dedicated to the formation of a Jewish state.”
The journalistic equivalent of: “well… what was she wearing?” https://t.co/7isQMQVczO pic.twitter.com/ogLkBCwuQj
— HonestReporting (@HonestReporting) March 13, 2026
NEWS YOU CAN USE: Why it’s easier and cheaper for you to buy GLP-1s.
CUBA LIBRE? Cuba confirms talks with Trump officials, raising hopes for US deal.
● Cuban President Miguel Díaz-Canel confirmed his government is holding talks with the Trump administration.
● The discussions are aimed at finding solutions to bilateral differences between the two nations.
● The talks could lead to a significant economic opening for Cuba and come amid escalating pressure from the U.S.
● Cuba also plans to release 51 prisoners as part of a deal brokered by the Vatican.
Cuban President Miguel Díaz-Canel on March 13 confirmed his government is holding talks with the Trump administration, in the latest sign that the communist-run nation is open to signing a possible historic economic deal with the United States.
Díaz-Canel made the announcement in a video broadcast on national television and he also spoke in a subsequent press conference, where he addressed Cuba’s energy needs amid a U.S. oil blockade, saying no fuel has entered Cuba in three months. He said the talks with the U.S. have reached initial phases only.
“These conversations have been aimed at seeking solutions through dialogue to the bilateral differences that exist between our two nations,” Díaz-Canel said.
The White House has not commented.
Related:
— Ezra Levant 🍁🚛 (@ezralevant) March 13, 2026
As Glenn asked last month on his Substack, “Will Cuba be Libre soon, and if so what happens next? And after that?”
THEY’VE PLAYED SIMILAR DIPLOMATIC GAMES BEFORE, BUT MAYBE IT’S DIFFERENT WHEN THE LIGHTS GO OUT: Is It Happening? Cuban Regime Makes a Big Announcement.
LIMITED TIME DEAL: TurboTax Deluxe Desktop Edition 2025, Federal & State Tax Return. #CommissionEarned
THAT’S DIFFERENT BECAUSE SHUT UP:
Imagine if a man attacked a black church, specifically targeting black children, because a black man killed his daughter. Imagine if someone told you "that's not racism, that's blowback"
idk, that would seem like a weird take to me bc it's saying that the killer is not a someone… pic.twitter.com/ch7MQoZnFW
— PoIiMath (@politicalmath) March 13, 2026
Except it’s not a daughter:
The Michigan shooter who attempted to murder toddlers at a Jewish preschool claimed he had lost “family members” in an Israeli strike in Lebanon.
Those “family members” were his brothers, who were members of Hezbollah, a U.S. Designated Terror Group. pic.twitter.com/ayOILKFWYU
— The Persian Jewess (@persianjewess) March 13, 2026
BRAVO:
Woke Ninth Circuit decides Korean spas have to let biological men swing their gear in front of women and children.
The dissent is pure gold: pic.twitter.com/kwYpQpcGBQ
— Peter St Onge, Ph.D. (@profstonge) March 13, 2026
AS DEMOCRATS HOLD DHS FUNDING HOSTAGE, EVEN SOME DEMOCRATS ARE WORRIED: Former DHS Sec. Jeh Johnson: We can’t tie policy disagreements to keeping the government funded.
SALENA ZITO ON THE MEDIA’S LOBSTER LIES: Our civilian-military bond is cracked.
NOTHING TO SEE HERE, MOVE ALONG: After 152% spike, NYPD changes how it reports hate crimes.
In January, the NYPD reported 58 bias crimes across the city, up from 23 in January 2025 — a jump the department said was driven largely by a spike in reports of anti-Jewish hate crimes. But by the time police reported the figures for February of this year, they had changed their criteria for reporting hate crimes.
Previously, the department reported hate crimes that were being reviewed. Now it only reports hate crimes that have been investigated and confirmed. Under the new method, the NYPD reported 38 hate crimes for the month. It did not provide a comparison to the same period last year.
The NYPD says only reporting confirmed hate crimes will more accurately show what’s happening in the city. But two scholars who study hate-crime reporting cautioned that it’s likely not that simple. They said the new method could make it look like hate crimes are dropping when they’re not.
I wonder what changed in January to make people think they could get away with more hate crimes in NYC.
GOODER AND HARDER, NEW YORK:
🚨NYC Mayor socialist Zohran Mamdani has proposed lowering the exemption on the death tax (estate tax) from $7.1 million down to only $750,000.
He would also increase the death tax from 16% to 50%.
No other jurisdiction in the USA confiscates wealth at death from people with… pic.twitter.com/FMEXCxFyVG
— Wall Street Mav (@WallStreetMav) March 13, 2026
Elect a socialist, get socialism — go figure.
WHEN YOU’RE A LEFTIST WHO’S LOST VARIETY…:
Colbert’s removal from the air, when it was announced last July, was legitimately seismic news, for the industry and for an audience who saw him as a crucial voice for the anti-Trump Resistance since the 2016 election. The timing of the news, though, meant that Colbert had an entire final season to play out with all parties, from writers and producers to host to guests, knowing that the end was in sight. (This differentiates it from the brief period when “Tonight Show” host Conan O’Brien’s job was in limbo during the O’Brien-Jay Leno succession crisis — then, the precariousness and uncertainty of the situation gave the show incredible tension and voltage.)
What has ended up making it to air has been an increasingly puffy tribute to the show’s own host. The endless bouquets being tossed Colbert’s way have started to make the studio smell a bit cloying.
Granted, these are Colbert’s guests having an emotional response to a host they liked being removed from air, and in what seems to be an unfair way, to prove new Paramount CEO David Ellison’s Trumpist bona fides amidst the Skydance-Paramount merger. It reminds one of how many other institutions are caving right now — universities, law firms, to say nothing of corporations across the entertainment industry. But the show’s focus on its own host’s misfortune has become outsized and a bit dramatic, especially because so many other institutions are in crisis: With everything else going on in the world, we have to go through a monthslong celebration-of-life for a comedian whose job is coming to an end?
Related: Sykes Urges Colbert, Pope Leo To ‘Burn This B**** Down:’
CBS’s Stephen Colbert welcomed comedian Wanda Sykes to Thursday’s taping of The Late Show for a conversation that was as ridiculous as it was wide-ranging. In the span of just a few minutes, Sykes urged Colbert to team up with Pope Leo and “burn this bitch down” on the night of his final show, demanded that TSA agents be paid while omitting that the reason they go unpaid is because of a Democrat shutdown, and helped Colbert resurrect a wildly misleading talking point about Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth’s food spending.
Sykes implored, “So, the last show what you going to do? You’ve got to go the hell off the last show, like, burn this bitch down. You got to—I mean—”
She also quipped, “I heard they turning it into a Walmart, so don’t worry about it. So, yeah—I mean, you always bring the fire every night. But that last show has to be like, like destruction. Like, yeah.”
Colbert destroys CBS on the way out? Wanda, your terms are definitely acceptable.
MORE LIKE THIS, PLEASE: U.S. Treasury Sanctions Hamas ‘Charities,’ North Korean Scammers.
Anyone else notice a big uptick in scam texts over the last week? I normally get close to zero, but that’s now up to two or three a day.
A BRUTAL AND NECESSARY REMINDER OF WHO TOM NICHOLS IS. READ IT:
Hello Professor Nichols,
You spent twenty-five years at the Naval War College. You taught the officers who would go on to run America's wars. Famously, you never served in any of them.
In February 2003, you were at your desk in Newport when you wrote this, about Colin Powell’s… pic.twitter.com/1e2I2l1jEP
— DataRepublican (small r) (@DataRepublican) March 13, 2026
BE PREPARED: FBI trained Michigan Jewish temple’s staff how to handle active shooters weeks before attack.
The FBI posted about the active shooter seminar Jan. 30, which was designed to help clergy and staff at the temple learn how to respond to an active shooter situation amid a rise in antisemitism.
“FBI Detroit led an Active Shooter Attack Prevention and Preparedness training for the clergy and staff of Temple Israel in West Bloomfield,” the field office posted on X. “The FBI course combines lessons learned from years of research and employs scenario-based exercises to help participants practice the decision-making process of the Run, Hide, Fight principles and take necessary actions for survival. We appreciate them for having us.”
The field office said it has also trained other organizations in the state who are trying to protect schools, houses of worship, medical facilities, government facilities and other public gathering sites and communities.
Don’t be a soft target.
THE LEFT KNOWS WHO ITS ENEMIES ARE AND BEHAVES ACCORDINGLY:
100% chance this goober is going to prosecute the ROTC cadet who stopped the shooter.
Bank on it. https://t.co/UeB77Msi5X
— Amy Curtis (@RantyAmyCurtis) March 12, 2026
THE ENEMY WITHIN (LATIN AMERICA EDITION): FBI Opens Office in Ecuador Amid Warnings of Hamas, Hezbollah, and IRGC Presence.
Ergonomic Long Handle Toenail Clippers with Catcher. #CommissionEarned
PRIORITIES: Food stamp recipients sue Agriculture Department over restrictions on sugary drinks, candy.
The suit was filed Wednesday in federal court in Washington, D.C., by a private firm and the National Center for Law and Economic Justice, which advocates for low-income people, on behalf of five plaintiffs.
The plaintiffs argue the restrictions “destabilize food access” for participants in the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program, known as SNAPS, in the states in which the USDA has approved the “food restriction” waivers, according to Reuters.
The plaintiffs live in Colorado, Iowa, Nebraska, Tennessee and West Virginia, and said that either they or family members rely on the restricted foods to manage health conditions such as diabetes and allergies, or to obtain energy boosts to conduct their daily lives.
According to the lawsuit, the waivers cause confusion at the checkout line and irreparable harm by forcing the plaintiffs to choose between spending cash on restricted items or forgoing spending money on rent and transportation.
End SNAP. Make soup kitchens great again.
