September 1, 2026
KEIR TODAY, GONE TOMORROW: Keir Starmer Just Quit Parliament, Too.
EDITORS… EDITING? CAN THEY DO THAT?
"Editor in Chief performs journalism . .. leftists outraged"
— nero (@n3ro) September 1, 2026
READER FAVORITE: Snailax Full Body Massage Mat with Heat. #CommisisonEarned
PRIVACY: DeSantis bans Flock cameras on state roads in Florida.
The move came less than a week after Mr. DeSantis echoed the concerns of Florida residents who complained the cameras, powered by artificial intelligence, go too far in monitoring the public and are being used in some cases for nefarious reasons by rogue police officers and others.
“I’m all about law enforcement having the tools to be able to hold criminals accountable,” Mr. DeSantis said last week during a press conference at Florida International University. “But I don’t want to have this become a surveillance state.”
Mr. DeSantis called for a legislative overhaul of the law governing the use of the cameras, which number in the thousands in Florida.
“I think these cameras, these license plate readers, I think it’s out of control,” he said.
Just yesterday: Responding to Their Customers, Gun Stores Take Down Their Flock Cameras.
GET RESULTS FAST:
As I predicted, @washingtonpost has finally edited its despicable and inaccurate report on me @CynicalPublius & @RobManess to correct the embarrassing misspellings of my name by @DanLamothe.
Now, they should correct the false implication that we were paid to spread propaganda… pic.twitter.com/yow7Py0lJB
— Kurt Schlichter (@KurtSchlichter) September 1, 2026
Kurt might have to wait a bit longer for this: “Now, they should correct the false implication that we were paid to spread propaganda for the Pentagon and apologize to us.”
Full background here.
OMG! WHATS UP POST-IRAN FOR TDSERS? It hasn’t happened just yet, but Trump’s Anaconda strategy against Iran’s Revolutionary Guard regime seems to be steadily tightening toward victory. Those mischievous expositors at Issues & Insights worry what will happen to millions of Trump Derangement Syndrome (TDS) sufferers when Orange Man Bad puts the final touch on the victory.
TALARICO IN 2020: Capitalism Is White Supremacy and Texas Oil Is Kinda Racist.
Just wait until campaign ads feature Talarico’s thoughts on capitalism and the state’s oil industry. That will be coming too, along with Talarico’s radical positions on abortion, and perhaps even Talarico’s foolish and uninformed remarks on the Karmelo Anthony case, which blew up last week in a hearing that forced a lot of Anthony’s previous crimes and bizarre behavior into the open. Talarico won’t have anywhere to hide, and while there may be some concerns about Paxton’s baggage, he’s won three statewide elections … and that’s three more than Talarico, or any other Texas Democrat in the past 32 years.
Eschew all modalities of cocksuredness, y’all.
“HUMILIATING” PRESUPPOSES A SENSE OF SHAME: Wolf Blitzer’s Trump Mail-In Voting Lie Blows Up in His Face With Humiliating Correction.
THAT’S HOW I REMEMBER IT:
What made the 80s special was that almost NO ONE — except some teachers who still thought it was the 60s — was uptight.
Everyone was cool. Everyone could take a joke. You never had to walk on eggshells. The girls were cool. Race relations were cool. We all had part-time jobs.…
— John Ocasio-Rodham Nolte (@NolteNC) September 1, 2026
CHINA IS ASSHOE: Feds seize domains in San Diego to block China from cyber hacking entities, from NASA to the Fed. “According to court filings, the platforms infected thousands of devices worldwide to construct an obfuscation network that masked attack origins. Federal agents reportedly neutralized both tools by seizing hard-coded domains essential for the malware’s communication.”
READER FAVORITE: Ensure Max Protein Milk Chocolate Shake. #CommissionEarned
AMERICA’S NEWSPAPER OF RECORD:
NFL Fans Excited For Start Of Taylor Swift Season https://t.co/y0XAk0wqK0
— The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) September 1, 2026
Almost as much as they’re excited about this recent development in Roger Goodell’s NFL: Map Shows NFL Teams With Male Cheerleaders Amid Online Scrutiny.
The Philadelphia Eagles now have male cheerleaders. pic.twitter.com/N4sytTBFzq
— Breaking911 (@Breaking911) August 31, 2026
In accordance with the prophecy:
Dallas Cowboys Relieved To No Longer Be Gayest Team In League https://t.co/jMGzX28YrA pic.twitter.com/RiD0aGJe7v
— The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) August 18, 2025
Speaking of the Cowboys, the ghost of Tex Schramm weeps, wonders where it all went wrong for his beloved league.
WHICH IS WHY WE NEVER SEE THE OMELETTE:
— Alice Smith (@TheAliceSmith) September 1, 2026
CAN YOU TAKE IT UNTIL YOU NEED GLASSES? A Popular ED Medication Was Just Linked to a Greater Risk of Blindness in Men Over 40.
CONSTITUENT SERVICE:
This is a scam. It's just free money for drug addicts. We tried this in San Francisco. Addicts would just pour cola on clean needles, stick them in a Sharps container and return them for cash. More radical harm reduction from @drugpolicyorg. pic.twitter.com/HypUdFu6HJ
— T Wolf 🌁 (@Twolfrecovery) September 1, 2026
As Hasan Piker is to Abdul El-Sayed, Tucker Carlson is to Vice President Vance. Speaking to a large Jewish audience at the Republican Jewish Coalition National Leadership Summit in remarks that were supposed to be off-the-record for some reason, Vance dodged any comment on Carlson.
The Daily Wire has posted a transcript of Vance’s remarks. RJC chairman Norm Coleman turned to the subject of “Jew hatred. He mentioned the names of Carlson, Megyn Kelly, Joe Rogan, and Nick Fuentes. Norm observed that they have platformed anti-semites. Carlson has become an insane purveyor of the mind rot.
If Vance gets the nomination in 2028 and doesn’t have a Sister Souljah moment with Tucker, the left’s October Surprise attack ads will write themselves:
If JD Vance thinks he can win in 2028 and still be aligned with this mental patient, he’s smoking meth. https://t.co/elS0nfWGRy
— Eli Lake (@EliLake) July 24, 2026
ARE YOU ENTERTAINED? Wolf Blitzer’s Trump Mail-In Voting Lie Blows Up in His Face With Humiliating Correction.
NEWS YOU CAN USE: How Exercise Can Biologically Reprogram Aging Skin.
DISPATCHES FROM THE EDUCATION APOCALYPSE:
We are quite literally teaching people to be America-hating criminals. https://t.co/qVZVDirvsh
— Wilfred Reilly (@wil_da_beast630) September 1, 2026
OH, CANADA:
🇨🇦 (this is real) pic.twitter.com/Ucx2FNdi1q
— Pete Hegseth (@PeteHegseth) September 1, 2026
MATH IS HARD: Talarico’s ‘Paxton Is Crooked’ Attack Debunked. “James Talarico has accused him of ‘getting rich’ off his office. There’s only one problem with this theory: math.”