DEVELOPING: Gunshots heard near White House. “The incident reportedly happened near 17th Street and Pennsylvania Avenue, which is the intersection just northwest of the White House.”

UPDATE:

OUR LONG NATIONAL NIGHTMARE IS OVER: The Long Farewell to Stephen Colbert Is Finally Over; Now We Can Laugh at the Grave Mourning of His Loss.

Many others this week have been flooding the headlines with this cancellation, and it has been a miasma of misinformation. As the show closes, the ongoing conceit has been that Colbert has been forced off the airwaves by President Trump. This, despite the reason given by multiple news outlets showing that this was a business decision by the network. First reported by Puck News, the program’s fiscal losses of between $40-50 million a year for CBS were also stated as a cause by the New York Post, and confirmed by the Wall Street Journal.

But let’s not allow data and spreadsheets to interrupt a political narrative! Trump cannot tolerate being insulted, and so he was forcing Colbert off the air as a form of retribution. As alleged noted historian Jon Meacham said, “Always worry when they come for the comedians.”

Exactly. CBS has replaced a member of the Democrats’ palace guard…

…With a man who says this:

[Byron] Allen has revealed that he plans to lease the time slot from the network and sell its ad revenue himself. “I’m putting a lot of money in their cash register,” he said. “I am a gift from the money gods*. And the comedy gods.”

His series, however, will stay far away from the type of political humor that defined The Late Show. “I don’t care who you vote for. I just don’t care,” Allen said. “That’s your business. Go do what you gotta do, you know? I’m just here to make you laugh.”

Instead, Comics Unleashed will maintain its original format and feature, as Allen explained, “nothing political, nothing sexist, nothing racist, nothing antisemitic, nothing homophobic.” He added that he wants his show to “just be funny.”

The response from another palace guard? Jimmy Kimmel Urges Viewers to “Never Watch CBS Again” After Colbert Finale.

To paraphrase Jon Meacham, always worry when the palace guard comes for the comedians:

* Wait, CBS will have a net inflow of money during their late night timeslot? That’s got to be a relief after all the cash this show hemorrhaged:

UPDATE: “Always worry when they come for the comedians:”

JOHN NOLTE: Supergirl Actress Continues to Implode with Ridicule of ‘Christian Dads.’

There was no backlash against the Wonder Woman series 50 years ago. No backlash against Ripley in Alien and Aliens over 40 years ago. Linda Hamilton? Pam Grier? Buffy? All of them loved, embraced, and are now iconic.

Anyway, after starting this fight back in March, Little Miss Entitled-Fake-Trailblazer is now responding to the criticism she desperately sought by ridiculing “Christian Dads.”

“I guess women know that this is just how it’s always been, unfortunately,” Alcock said of the criticism over her retarded comments back in March. “And it’s from a lot of people whose profiles have no photo, who are burner accounts. Or someone’s name and then ‘Dad of four, Christian,’ which is hilarious to me. But I mean, whose opinion do you really care about? If you’re pissing the right kind of people off, you’re doing OK.”

Man alive.

Okay, it’s not all her fault. She’s pretty young and was even younger when fame arrived a few years ago with HBO’s House of Dragon. Fame warps you, especially at that age, and especially in a Hollywood that no longer stops its young stars from imploding like this. Sure, Mickey Rooney was an unholy terror in real life, but his public persona was so expertly managed that he became the biggest movie star in the world for a few years.

Warner Brothers shot themselves in the foot while promoting 2006’s Superman Returns, with the infamous slogan, “Truth, justice and . . . all that stuff,” and aiming the marketing of what should have been a family-friendly movie towards a gay audience. As a result:

While the film was one of the biggest films of the year, earning $391.1 million on a budget of $204–223 million and becoming the ninth highest-grossing film of 2006, Warner Bros. was disappointed with the worldwide box office return and cancelled a sequel for release in 2009.

Supergirl’s slogan is “Truth. Justice. Whatever.”

“Whatever” may well be the audience’s response next month.

TRUMP GOT INTRO FROM BIG NAME AT RALLY, AND LIBERALS WERE NOT HAPPY CAMPERS:

President Donald Trump was in New York for a rally on Friday at Rockland Community College in Suffern to support Republican Rep. Mike Lawler (NY-17) for re-election.

As our sister site Townhall observed, Trump got a pretty big introduction while he was there from N.Y. Giants quarterback Jaxson Dart. “Big Blue” is the nickname for the Giants, so of course, he first gave a shout-out to them and the fans.

“What an honor, what a privilege it is to be here,” Dart declared, then he introduced the “45th and 47th President of the United States.”

Trump was equally gracious, praising Dart’s skills and saying he, Trump, loved New York and that we needed to “straighten it out.”

Related: Question asked and answered:

 

HEY, WE DON’T SERVE THEIR KIND HERE! YOUR DROIDS — THEY’LL HAVE TO WAIT OUTSIDE. WE DON’T WANT THEM HERE! Southwest Bans Humanoid Robots After Viral Passenger Flights.

A humanoid robot made it to Dallas. Its fellow robots may not get the same boarding pass.

Southwest Airlines has banned “human-like or animal-like robots” from passenger cabins and checked luggage, citing concerns about the lithium-ion batteries used to power them. The rule follows viral flights in which travelers bought seats for event robots, creating confusion for crews over whether the machines counted as passengers, carry-ons, or something stranger in between.

The ban turns a quirky travel story into a sharper industry question: Will other airlines follow Southwest’s lead as lifelike robots become more common in public spaces?

Notorious robophobe Matthew Yglesias smiles.

WHEN REALITY BITES: Sen. Jon Ossoff (D-Ga.) and Rep. Jamie Raskin (D-Md) claim, respectively, that Trump gutted Medicaid to pay for tax cuts and Trump created a hush fund to convert J-6 rioters into his “private militia.”

Reality bites for politicians like Ossoff and Raskin when their claims meet, for example, Jim Agresti’s Just Facts Daily. It’s the first of what I hope will be a continuing series of PJ Media columns in which lying politicos in both parties are confronted with Just Facts.

WELL, HE’S RIGHT:

“Colleges are basically for fun and to prove you can do your chores. But they’re not for learning.”

CUBA:

NOT ACTUALLY SURPRISING:

HAHA: